Dear Mayor Quan:
I'm sure you have received a "gazzilion" opinions about your job performance since you were sworn is as the first Asian American Mayor of Oakland. First off, because you benefited from the 1st Mayoral "Choice Balloting" election held in Oakland, many citizens questioned the validity of your candidacy.
Please allow me to introduce myself and why I'm typing this entry.
My name is Jarrett Chin and I was born and reared in the city the voters entrusted you with. I am a product of the Oakland Unified School District. (Glenview Elementary, McChesney Jr High, now Edna Brewer Middle, and Oakland Senior High; please note that as a student of Oakland Unified, the teachers went on strike 3x's; then again you should already know about that considering you served on the Board) I received a BA in Ethnic Studies (Asian American Studies Option) from California State University, Hayward. I also considered one of your fellow activist as a personal mentor. (Richard Aoki) Currently I am a San Francisco Bay Area-based actor and performer.
Throughout my lifetime, I remained as a registered voter within the City of Oakland until 2005 even though I may have resided in San Francisco, Monterey Park, El Cerrito, and Gardena. I kept my parents' Glenview neighborhood address as a permanent address over those years. In 2005, my mother passed on, and my sister and I eventually sold the Oakland home and I've resided in San Mateo county ever since.
The reason why I'm typing this blog piece is because of the discussions I've had with friends and family over the past five years. Those discussions pertained to whether or not I would return to living in Oakland. After all, though I reside in San Mateo County, I am often in Oakland dining at my always dwindling favorite eating spots, serving as a board member for Oakland High's Alumni Association, visiting my deceased family members at Mountain View Cemetery, and catching my Oakland Raiders games. If anyone is familiar with my numerous blogs, they know I have my heart that's out and open towards Oakland. So many times I'm often asked over and over again...
So why don't you just move back to Oakland?
I often share with people that the main reason why I have not moved back to Oakland is because of the time required of me in San Francisco, and the uncertainty of traffic due to the ongoing construction of the Bay Bridge. However, that's only a partial factor.
That same year that I moved from Oakland to the Peninsula, I visited my close friend in Singapore. I totally fell in love with that country and with the people who reside there. Though there are documented restrictions out there such as a ban on chewing gum, I was thoroughly impressed with the nightlife out there. Actually I was culture shocked. So many neighborhoods and locations throughout the city-state were opened AND SAFE to walk around, even at 3am. It was not uncommon for people to walk around at 3am and not be harassed, let alone attacked. In fact I spent 2006-08 intensely looking for employment and moving opportunities specifically over there. In addition to the overall low crime rate and safety, Singapore is an extremely clean country.
I'm sure you've heard the expression, "a dog would never return to bones after eating steak." I'm sure you're getting a good idea of where I'm going with all of this. Why would I return? Why should I return? Granted, San Francisco's nightlife has more of a transient alcohol-driven nightlife, but at least a nightlife exists. Upon my visits to Oakland, I'm lucky to find a spot open after 9pm on a given night, and even if I were to find such a spot, would I be safe enough to walk from my car to the venue? I'll admit, had blogging existed during my teenage years, I'm sure someone would blog to the then current mayor (Elihu Harris) about how unsafe they felt at Lakeshore and/or near the now-defunct Henry J Kaiser Center because of the malicious teens based on my past behavior. I'll be the first to concede that I was not a complete angel growing up in Oakland.
Last week, I was shocked to learn that the nephew of one of my schoolmates was tragically shot and killed. I do not know what official number count he is on your city's homicide list, yet are you aware that such a list is increasing by the moment? So much for your "100 Block Plan," Oakland consists more than a hundred blocks. I want to remind you that you are responsible for every block within the Oakland city limits, not just those 100 you singled out.
Over the years, my biggest concern as an Oaklander was making sure we kept our professional sports teams. Now after leaving the city and adapted as an outsider looking in, I cannot blame the respected owners for looking elsewhere to play. Aside from the Raiders whom Mark Davis has actually publicly stated his interest to remain in Oakland, the owners of both the A's and Warriors deserve no more a$$-kissing from you guys. The Warriors has played in Oakland for 40 years now and has NEVER considered themselves as THE OAKLAND WARRIORS. It's clear that The Warriors want to drop "Golden State" in favor of "San Francisco." If Coliseum City still insists on building a large capacity arena to accompany a stadium, then I highly recommend negotiations with the Sacramento Kings instead of the Warriors. As for the Athletics, as long as Mr Wolff is in charge, Oakland should not negotiate (ie, BEG) with them. I think Coliseum City is a wonderful idea, just not for the current owners of those two specific franchises. Speaking of Coliseum City and the speculation on how it's going to be possibly funded, cleaning up the immediate 3 mile radius of the proposed Coliseum City both literally and figuratively (violent crime) would boost the probability tremendously. If there will be a reliance on foreign investors to build CC, then Oakland International Airport needs to include flights in and out of other countries besides Mexico and Canada. "International" goes beyond North America, y'know. (edit note: Now aware that there are regular flights going in/out of some Scandinavian countries via Oakland Int'l Airport 10/2013)
Have you looked at a map of California, more specifically The San Francisco Bay Area recently? Have you looked at an almanac? Oakland has been top rated regarding climate. The City of Oakland, YOUR city is located in the most centralized prime location in the Bay Area, yet it's one of the most avoided cities not just in the Bay Area, but the entire Northern California. (If it's not already THE MOST avoided city) Just the Coliseum area alone, BART, Amtrak, 880, and the airport are within reach, but the concentration of homicides dominate the perception in regards to that area. In any other city with similar transportation access, such an area would be prime real estate, prime development. Yet we still need to wait another year for a friggin EIR? Meanwhile as I type this, the likelihood of another shooting happening within 2 miles from the aforementioned area is highly likely.
Please don't blame the economy and/or lack of funds. That is a catch-22 that's been created in Oakland. Funding comes from revenue and taxes, but as long as businesses don't feel safe to operate in Oakland, bye bye revenue. I have an idea: next time instead of overspending to accommodate a group of outsiders like Occupy Oakland, how 'bout using that money to protect the citizens and businesses within your city. I have news for you: Oakland "AINT" San Francisco. Let San Francisco handle the visitors, outsiders and tourists, that's what San Francisco is good at. Oakland needs to take care of Oakland and Oaklanders. Isn't that a concept?
And if I begin to see Oakland taking care of Oakland, maybe I'll feel safe enough to return and live there.
Sincerely,
Jarrett Chin
PS, going back to the fact that you were the 1st Oakland Mayor of Asian
descent and the other fact that my undergrad work was in Asian American
Studies, for the record if I was still a voter in Oakland, you would
not have received my 1st or 2nd choice vote for mayor. Just
sayin'...
Monday, April 30, 2012
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
The King and Queen of Hearts
Happy Hearts Day!!!
So for those of us who are considered "single" and/or were physically away from our respected significant other for one reason or another and were unable to spend time together today, I'm going to pose an important question. Actually scratch that. This question is for everyone, including those who went all out and celebrated today with their respected "special someone someone."
What special thing didja do for your absolutely, wonderfully, ever lasting and loyal "TRUE LOVE?"
Now before answering, I want to clarify and be specific of whom I'm referring to when I ask that question.
What special thing did you do for that person who looks back at you every time you look in the mirror?
If today is designed to celebrate your "special" relationships, wouldn't the most important relationship in your life be acknowledged in some shape or form today? Shouldn't the most important relationship in your life be acknowledged in some shape or form today if today is designed to celebrate those "special" relationships?
Yes, I am referring to YOU
Who else is out there? Who is with you 24/7? Who sees you naked every time you undress? Who else are you fully responsible for?
I used to be very cynical towards Valentine's Day. I was a victim. Victim of bad relationships, girlfriends from Hell, singleness, over charging restaurants, unrealistic expectations. You name it, I was once a victim of it until the sheer utter hateness and livid bile permeated my entire beingness come every February 14.
As someone of Chinese descent, thank God the Lunar New Year rolled around the same time. That enabled me to effortlessly find "distractions." People would ask in years past what my plans were for February 14, and my answer would be that I'm "too busy" with this or that Lunar New Year event. For the most part, it worked.
And besides, why designate ONE DAY out of the entire year to celebrate those special relationships in your life? That's pretty sad and shallow to "NEED" a day remembering and celebrating when one should remember and celebrate their relationships every day!
I've been in an "off again, on again" type of deal for the past 3 years. We had a big squirmish during Valentine's Day 2011 when I said "it's Chinese New Year and we're 2000 miles away from each other." It WAS CNY and she was located in Asia while I'm here in the States. I was a volunteer for the Miss Chinatown USA Pageant which is held annually on Chinese New Year, and someone posted a shot of me distributing Valentines gift to the beauty contestants. We almost split up, and thankfully we didn't.
So this week, something hit me about today regarding relationships. Last year I focused on the Lunar New Year's festivities because I didn't have much faith in the relationship I was in during that time. I wasn't having much faith as today we being approached closer and closer. On top of that, the Lunar New Year concluded a week ago. So when I attended church service this past Sunday, Rev. Donna asked all of us a poignant question.
How are you celebrating Valentine's Day with the most important relationship in YOUR life: YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOURSELF?
Huh? Myself? What?
Yup, all these years I've neglected the most important relationship in my life. ME. And then I wonder why I was such a "victim" to all those "Bad Valentines Day incidents" over the years.
Could it be that had I improve the connection to me, a lot of that would've disappeared? Could it be, I would've been more open to celebrate last year? Could it be that the relationship I was in would've been more "on" than "off?"
If someone asked me to give them $10, common sense would say that I would need to have at least $10 to fulfill their request.
To say that Valentine's Day celebrates the special relationships in our lives, especially our relationship with ourselves isn't being corny, or "touchy-feely," it's common sense.
So today, my special thing I did for myself was a little common sense.
So for those of us who are considered "single" and/or were physically away from our respected significant other for one reason or another and were unable to spend time together today, I'm going to pose an important question. Actually scratch that. This question is for everyone, including those who went all out and celebrated today with their respected "special someone someone."
What special thing didja do for your absolutely, wonderfully, ever lasting and loyal "TRUE LOVE?"
Now before answering, I want to clarify and be specific of whom I'm referring to when I ask that question.
What special thing did you do for that person who looks back at you every time you look in the mirror?
If today is designed to celebrate your "special" relationships, wouldn't the most important relationship in your life be acknowledged in some shape or form today? Shouldn't the most important relationship in your life be acknowledged in some shape or form today if today is designed to celebrate those "special" relationships?
Yes, I am referring to YOU
Who else is out there? Who is with you 24/7? Who sees you naked every time you undress? Who else are you fully responsible for?
I used to be very cynical towards Valentine's Day. I was a victim. Victim of bad relationships, girlfriends from Hell, singleness, over charging restaurants, unrealistic expectations. You name it, I was once a victim of it until the sheer utter hateness and livid bile permeated my entire beingness come every February 14.
As someone of Chinese descent, thank God the Lunar New Year rolled around the same time. That enabled me to effortlessly find "distractions." People would ask in years past what my plans were for February 14, and my answer would be that I'm "too busy" with this or that Lunar New Year event. For the most part, it worked.
And besides, why designate ONE DAY out of the entire year to celebrate those special relationships in your life? That's pretty sad and shallow to "NEED" a day remembering and celebrating when one should remember and celebrate their relationships every day!
I've been in an "off again, on again" type of deal for the past 3 years. We had a big squirmish during Valentine's Day 2011 when I said "it's Chinese New Year and we're 2000 miles away from each other." It WAS CNY and she was located in Asia while I'm here in the States. I was a volunteer for the Miss Chinatown USA Pageant which is held annually on Chinese New Year, and someone posted a shot of me distributing Valentines gift to the beauty contestants. We almost split up, and thankfully we didn't.
So this week, something hit me about today regarding relationships. Last year I focused on the Lunar New Year's festivities because I didn't have much faith in the relationship I was in during that time. I wasn't having much faith as today we being approached closer and closer. On top of that, the Lunar New Year concluded a week ago. So when I attended church service this past Sunday, Rev. Donna asked all of us a poignant question.
How are you celebrating Valentine's Day with the most important relationship in YOUR life: YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOURSELF?
Huh? Myself? What?
Yup, all these years I've neglected the most important relationship in my life. ME. And then I wonder why I was such a "victim" to all those "Bad Valentines Day incidents" over the years.
Could it be that had I improve the connection to me, a lot of that would've disappeared? Could it be, I would've been more open to celebrate last year? Could it be that the relationship I was in would've been more "on" than "off?"
If someone asked me to give them $10, common sense would say that I would need to have at least $10 to fulfill their request.
To say that Valentine's Day celebrates the special relationships in our lives, especially our relationship with ourselves isn't being corny, or "touchy-feely," it's common sense.
So today, my special thing I did for myself was a little common sense.
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Wandering in the Undergrad Wilderness
Few nights back I was lucky enough to spend some times with my "college friends" for dinner. It feels a little weird to be saying that especially since all of us have completed our degree more than ten years ago. I was older than my group of friends because of the time and journey I took before completing my degree. After dinner as I was driving home I reflected on what it took for me to complete my program and realized the divine participation in the entire process.
I was not a model student in college whatsoever. In fact it took me FOUR YEARS of community college to accrue two years worth of transferable credit to a four year university. Once I got to my FIRST university, I didn't too much of what I was supposed to do.
So I transferred from Peralta College to San Francisco State University in the 90s. For every four classes I took per semester, I completed between 1-2 classes. And that was considered a "good" semester. Because of the financial aid I qualified for, signing up for classes and dropping before the drop deadline and sell/resell books became an "enterprise" for me. Unfortunately that "enterprise" was not creating enough income, so another "enterprising" friend introduced me to MLM. I wasn't really interested on the marketing or the selling aspect of MLM which was why I was unsuccessful at it, however I discovered a new love and passion: personal growth/development. It became such a priority, the semester of completing 1-2 classes for every 4 classes declined to 0-1 class for every 4 classes per semester. Since I wasn't selling enough in MLM and since my "enterprise" declined, I took out more loans. After all, it WAS "going to my 'education.'" Eventually academic probation at SFSU won out, so I was given an opportunity "get a REAL education." (Personal growth)
I set goals for myself that I considered at that time "unreachable." One of those goals included tracking down my biological mother. (Another project in addition to personal development that took priority over SF State) When I achieved that goal of meeting her and coming face-to-face, it added a radically new dynamic into my life that I was totally unprepared for. It became a situation where I learned the meaning behind the saying:
"Be careful what you wish for, you just may get it!"
The meeting and encounter opened a can of worms that was overwhelming, and as a result, I found myself seeking refuge in the underground rave scenes and bars. Even that refuge took priority over the quest for personal development. Eventually I was at such a loss, that's when seeking a religious path became a way of life for me. In a way, the religious path became my personal development program. To say that I was a bit overzealous...yeah I was. I had to be at that time. I had to dive in head first. Eventually I no longer worked in MLM and found full time work with GTE, which was the predecessor to Verizon. (I had set another goal in the early-mid 90s, to get a cell phone before it became the norm to have one. This was still during the pager days, and having a cell phone means having impeccable credit which I did not have after defaulting on my school loans.) While working with my cubicle mates at GTE, we compared our salaries and I learned that my colleague were making about 30% more than I was. The difference between them and myself was because they had a BA degree. I later learned that they had different degrees, none had anything to do with working in telecom or business. They just had a degree and were offered more for the exact same work we were doing.
I was selected to travel to China on behalf of my church to teach conversational English for the summer of 1997. Funny part during my goal setting session in one of my personal development class, I wrote a goal to "be in Hong Kong before July 1, 1997." Guess where I had to stop first before China? Yup, Hong Kong! Guess when I arrived there? June 14, 1997. Talking about exceeding my expectation, I got to be there when The Handover occurred!
Among our team of 8 assigned to teach English, 7/8 were either still in college completing their degree or had already completed their degree. Guess who was the single teammate who was neither? Yup, and guess who was having an inner turmoil of self-consciousness, inner shame, and un-worthiness because of that? Yup, me. So as we were wrapping up one of our assignments at JiShou University, I completely lost it during a banquet. The University President hosted a banquet in our honor to express gratitude for teaching his students, and spoke about excelling and valuing education and how his students specifically made extraordinary sacrifices in order to be students there. I eventually took a turn to speak on behalf of the entire team following his speech. I shared that I now understood what I thought was an insane obsession of my father for me to attend and finish college, how I did not take advantage of my opportunity to complete my degree, and how honored I felt that he entrusted our team (specifically me) to teach them English and American culture. I also impulsively declared that I would finish my degree once I returned to the States. I was then invited to the table of the University President who personally toasted me and wished me well. Now receiving a personal well-wish from a host with such a position at a Chinese banquet is a big deal. I made a declaration that I had no idea how I was going to keep. My full-time job at that time awaited my return.
Or so I thought.
Upon returning home from China, I learned that I was permanently replaced by the one who supposedly "temporarily" my replacement while I was gone. So it was back to job hunting again. I came across for a community development position at a local Christian university. Job requirements include office admin experience, public speaking experience and "an extensive knowledge of Oakland California." Benefits included medical, dental, and included classes and degree completion paid for by the university!!!
Talk about synchronicity, right? It was "a God thang" too, right? Well...yes it was.
So when Mike called me from the college to scheduled an interview for the position, I was ecstatic. I even wore an entire suit for the interview as opposed to my Dockers style pants with a button-down shirt and tie that I normally wear to interviews. We even had a conversation for a good fifteen minutes after the interview concluded. He assured me that I'll be hearing from him "soon."
Two weeks later, I received a phone call and job offer from Eve at Paging Networks. I asked her to allow me 48 hours before accepting the position. She gave me 24. I contacted Mike at the college. He said he offered the position to someone else. I started my new position at Paging Networks the following week. That was the fall of 1997. I worked with a motley crew of a department. It became a "day in, day out" routine for me. I eventually forgot about my impulsive declaration I made months earlier in China. After all, it was so far away. And its not like this president guy will ever find out anyways. I'm sure he'll never know one way or another. But I knew. So in the beginning of 98, our entire company received a pink slip or the option to re-locate to Utah. As for my department, we were on an "indefinite transition timetable." In other words, they knew we were going to be cut, they had no idea when. Little by little, Paging Networks office became more and more derelict.
Completing my degree just wasn't in the cards for me.
As my colleagues began to look and locate other jobs in the area, I too began a new job search. While other folks began to take time off for interviews, my supervisor would not allow my time off and eventually began demanding a doctor's note for each sick day. Anytime we received a new memo, we held our breath. A new memo meant a change and new policy creating a more challenging work environment which meant lower morale. Even at one point, my department jokingly voted me a "Most Likely to Go Postal on the Next Memo" award. When we received a new memo one day, we were getting ready for another "what the hell now" moment and one of my colleague began to drum roll in giving me my "award."
On behalf of Paging Networks, we would like to thank you for your patience and commitment to our transition. We are pleased to announce that as an additional assistance to ease the burden and transition of our dedicated employees, we have approved to all employees the tuition reimbursement program originally slated for our managers only.
I applied for the next quarter at Cal State Hayward and was accepted. To qualify for the tuition reimbursement, I needed to take courses that were considered "work related." My first course I signed up for was "Stress and Coping." After submitting the proof of enrollment for that specific class, I was pre-approved. With support from that professor and her colleague who was a clinical therapist, they submitted a document to what was left of the human resource department pleading for them to allow me to be approved for workman's comp stress-related work. Unfortunately I was approved to receive disability benefits only.
Regardless, I was able to take the time and attend school on a full-time basis. I received my BA in 2000 from Cal State HAYWARD, NOT East Bay.
I really thought I was meant to be offered that position at the Christian college to complete my degree. I even thought it was a "God thing" when I was getting closer and closer to the possibility. You could imagine my "what the hell" moment when I accepted to what was considered a "dead-end" job position. You could imagine the "what the f*ck" moment when the company announced the closure and the eventual, subsequent "WTF" moments with each company memo(s) that followed afterwards.
Yet it was all part of an elaborate scheme to an end result I declared in the summer of 1997. Was it a mechanism and a path I personally would've chosen to take? Absolutely not. It was, in the whole grand scheme of things probably the best thing to happen. Not knocking the Christian college, but the degree completion at that time was on organizational management, which was a business-related degree. It was far from where my passions and my academic strengths were. Also as a student at Hayward I was allowed an opportunity to pursue my craft of acting and theater which I would not have gotten at the other school. Lastly from a human resource standpoint, most people have heard of California State University, but the Christian college has less notoriety.
Here I was having dinner with friends from college (Hayward) reflecting on the journey that enabled us to cross paths with each other, and the thought occurred to me.
No way would I be enjoying this dinner had that job that I initially wanted been offered to me...
I was not a model student in college whatsoever. In fact it took me FOUR YEARS of community college to accrue two years worth of transferable credit to a four year university. Once I got to my FIRST university, I didn't too much of what I was supposed to do.
So I transferred from Peralta College to San Francisco State University in the 90s. For every four classes I took per semester, I completed between 1-2 classes. And that was considered a "good" semester. Because of the financial aid I qualified for, signing up for classes and dropping before the drop deadline and sell/resell books became an "enterprise" for me. Unfortunately that "enterprise" was not creating enough income, so another "enterprising" friend introduced me to MLM. I wasn't really interested on the marketing or the selling aspect of MLM which was why I was unsuccessful at it, however I discovered a new love and passion: personal growth/development. It became such a priority, the semester of completing 1-2 classes for every 4 classes declined to 0-1 class for every 4 classes per semester. Since I wasn't selling enough in MLM and since my "enterprise" declined, I took out more loans. After all, it WAS "going to my 'education.'" Eventually academic probation at SFSU won out, so I was given an opportunity "get a REAL education." (Personal growth)
I set goals for myself that I considered at that time "unreachable." One of those goals included tracking down my biological mother. (Another project in addition to personal development that took priority over SF State) When I achieved that goal of meeting her and coming face-to-face, it added a radically new dynamic into my life that I was totally unprepared for. It became a situation where I learned the meaning behind the saying:
"Be careful what you wish for, you just may get it!"
The meeting and encounter opened a can of worms that was overwhelming, and as a result, I found myself seeking refuge in the underground rave scenes and bars. Even that refuge took priority over the quest for personal development. Eventually I was at such a loss, that's when seeking a religious path became a way of life for me. In a way, the religious path became my personal development program. To say that I was a bit overzealous...yeah I was. I had to be at that time. I had to dive in head first. Eventually I no longer worked in MLM and found full time work with GTE, which was the predecessor to Verizon. (I had set another goal in the early-mid 90s, to get a cell phone before it became the norm to have one. This was still during the pager days, and having a cell phone means having impeccable credit which I did not have after defaulting on my school loans.) While working with my cubicle mates at GTE, we compared our salaries and I learned that my colleague were making about 30% more than I was. The difference between them and myself was because they had a BA degree. I later learned that they had different degrees, none had anything to do with working in telecom or business. They just had a degree and were offered more for the exact same work we were doing.
I was selected to travel to China on behalf of my church to teach conversational English for the summer of 1997. Funny part during my goal setting session in one of my personal development class, I wrote a goal to "be in Hong Kong before July 1, 1997." Guess where I had to stop first before China? Yup, Hong Kong! Guess when I arrived there? June 14, 1997. Talking about exceeding my expectation, I got to be there when The Handover occurred!
Among our team of 8 assigned to teach English, 7/8 were either still in college completing their degree or had already completed their degree. Guess who was the single teammate who was neither? Yup, and guess who was having an inner turmoil of self-consciousness, inner shame, and un-worthiness because of that? Yup, me. So as we were wrapping up one of our assignments at JiShou University, I completely lost it during a banquet. The University President hosted a banquet in our honor to express gratitude for teaching his students, and spoke about excelling and valuing education and how his students specifically made extraordinary sacrifices in order to be students there. I eventually took a turn to speak on behalf of the entire team following his speech. I shared that I now understood what I thought was an insane obsession of my father for me to attend and finish college, how I did not take advantage of my opportunity to complete my degree, and how honored I felt that he entrusted our team (specifically me) to teach them English and American culture. I also impulsively declared that I would finish my degree once I returned to the States. I was then invited to the table of the University President who personally toasted me and wished me well. Now receiving a personal well-wish from a host with such a position at a Chinese banquet is a big deal. I made a declaration that I had no idea how I was going to keep. My full-time job at that time awaited my return.
Or so I thought.
Upon returning home from China, I learned that I was permanently replaced by the one who supposedly "temporarily" my replacement while I was gone. So it was back to job hunting again. I came across for a community development position at a local Christian university. Job requirements include office admin experience, public speaking experience and "an extensive knowledge of Oakland California." Benefits included medical, dental, and included classes and degree completion paid for by the university!!!
Talk about synchronicity, right? It was "a God thang" too, right? Well...yes it was.
So when Mike called me from the college to scheduled an interview for the position, I was ecstatic. I even wore an entire suit for the interview as opposed to my Dockers style pants with a button-down shirt and tie that I normally wear to interviews. We even had a conversation for a good fifteen minutes after the interview concluded. He assured me that I'll be hearing from him "soon."
Two weeks later, I received a phone call and job offer from Eve at Paging Networks. I asked her to allow me 48 hours before accepting the position. She gave me 24. I contacted Mike at the college. He said he offered the position to someone else. I started my new position at Paging Networks the following week. That was the fall of 1997. I worked with a motley crew of a department. It became a "day in, day out" routine for me. I eventually forgot about my impulsive declaration I made months earlier in China. After all, it was so far away. And its not like this president guy will ever find out anyways. I'm sure he'll never know one way or another. But I knew. So in the beginning of 98, our entire company received a pink slip or the option to re-locate to Utah. As for my department, we were on an "indefinite transition timetable." In other words, they knew we were going to be cut, they had no idea when. Little by little, Paging Networks office became more and more derelict.
Completing my degree just wasn't in the cards for me.
As my colleagues began to look and locate other jobs in the area, I too began a new job search. While other folks began to take time off for interviews, my supervisor would not allow my time off and eventually began demanding a doctor's note for each sick day. Anytime we received a new memo, we held our breath. A new memo meant a change and new policy creating a more challenging work environment which meant lower morale. Even at one point, my department jokingly voted me a "Most Likely to Go Postal on the Next Memo" award. When we received a new memo one day, we were getting ready for another "what the hell now" moment and one of my colleague began to drum roll in giving me my "award."
On behalf of Paging Networks, we would like to thank you for your patience and commitment to our transition. We are pleased to announce that as an additional assistance to ease the burden and transition of our dedicated employees, we have approved to all employees the tuition reimbursement program originally slated for our managers only.
I applied for the next quarter at Cal State Hayward and was accepted. To qualify for the tuition reimbursement, I needed to take courses that were considered "work related." My first course I signed up for was "Stress and Coping." After submitting the proof of enrollment for that specific class, I was pre-approved. With support from that professor and her colleague who was a clinical therapist, they submitted a document to what was left of the human resource department pleading for them to allow me to be approved for workman's comp stress-related work. Unfortunately I was approved to receive disability benefits only.
Regardless, I was able to take the time and attend school on a full-time basis. I received my BA in 2000 from Cal State HAYWARD, NOT East Bay.
I really thought I was meant to be offered that position at the Christian college to complete my degree. I even thought it was a "God thing" when I was getting closer and closer to the possibility. You could imagine my "what the hell" moment when I accepted to what was considered a "dead-end" job position. You could imagine the "what the f*ck" moment when the company announced the closure and the eventual, subsequent "WTF" moments with each company memo(s) that followed afterwards.
Yet it was all part of an elaborate scheme to an end result I declared in the summer of 1997. Was it a mechanism and a path I personally would've chosen to take? Absolutely not. It was, in the whole grand scheme of things probably the best thing to happen. Not knocking the Christian college, but the degree completion at that time was on organizational management, which was a business-related degree. It was far from where my passions and my academic strengths were. Also as a student at Hayward I was allowed an opportunity to pursue my craft of acting and theater which I would not have gotten at the other school. Lastly from a human resource standpoint, most people have heard of California State University, but the Christian college has less notoriety.
Here I was having dinner with friends from college (Hayward) reflecting on the journey that enabled us to cross paths with each other, and the thought occurred to me.
No way would I be enjoying this dinner had that job that I initially wanted been offered to me...
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Annual Post for The New Year
Originally posted a year ago HERE.
I've decided to post this on a annual basis for New Years. Earlier this evening while watching a streaming NYE event, Rev Michael Beckwith pointed out that we do not need to wait for the numerical change on a calendar in order to create a transformation. We just need to choose, period.
You see, I grew up in a Chinese-American household. We had TWO New Years, give or take a month. In other words within a month if I had dropped off on a stated resolution in two weeks or less, there was a "second chance." Even so, since people from the Chinese community didn't really advocate the concept of a "New Year's Resolution," I hardly took advantage of my "2nd Chance."
So Happy Year of the Dragon. Here's my posting with some nominal editing word for word. Heck if the infamous Ann Landers could reprint her New Years column for forty-something years, why can't I repost, right?
You're never going to get me to answer that question.
"What's your New Year's Resolution?"
That question is probably perhaps the most counter-productive question for the majority of humanity seeking change and growth. Every month of January, I fight for parking spaces en route to the gym, and once I'm there, I'm salvaging what space is available for the workout class. Come the middle of February the attendance returns back to the normal regular gym attenders. That's just the physical resolution.
Please don't call me a cynic. I'm not. I'm sincerely into the growth for myself and other people. In fact, I'll be the first in line to support anyone and everyone who desires to make a change for the better in their life. So why am I so against the notion of making a new year's resolution? For starters, they don't work for the majority of people who pledge a resolution. I only use the gym as an example because I've observed this at the same gym for the past 5 years.
I am not ashamed of the fact that one of my past mentors was a 12-steps practitioner. Actually there were a couple of my mentors who regularly attended 12 steps meetings for one reason or another. One of the most valuable lessons I learned from their example was the value of TODAY. They didn't make bold, long-term resolutions, they simply made daily goals, one step at a time, one day at a time. From them I learned how to understand that expression:
So how do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time!
They lived it, they practiced it. It was from them that I learned to make "daily resolutions."
For the past few years of my pursuit of personal development, there was never more of a time where I had an appreciation learning from my 12-stepping mentors than during the time I "played" a "game" called PLD (Pacesetters Leadership Dynamics) What this was in a nutshell, 90 days of personal coaching, relationship building, accountability, and goal setting within a "team" setting. Throughout the 90 days, we reported in doing numerous challenging team and individual exercises to learn not only leadership, marketing, and relationship skills, but also to take a deeper look within. There were moments during those 90 days where I wanted to quit and walk away. However because of what I learned from my past mentors in taking things "a day at a time," I was able to complete one of the most challenging three-months period of my life. In that time frame, I went from 187 pounds to 173 pounds. (I'm currently at 175-77; PLD was almost 2 years ago) I invited and brought 12 people to church with me. Prior to that, I was a "lone ranger" church attender. I went on 22 dates with 8 different young ladies after putting myself on a 4 year dating drought. (2005-06 no dates; 2007 3 dates; 2008 2 dates) I contributed directly to 3 local charities in fund-raising and direct volunteer work, contacted my sister whom I had not spoken to in three years, became the first male student of the S Factor pole dancing course, and introduced over 17 people to the concept of personal development, 10 of them eventually signing up for taking a Basic course.
Now if I had looked at all that I did during those 90 days and was told that over the course of three months, I was going to do all of that, I would've went after it for maybe a week or two, then eventually gave up. However, I didn't because I took it a day at a time, and eventually 90 days came and passed.
The main disadvantage of the New Year's Resolution is that once most people fall off their respected path, they tend to stay off until the end of the year to re-commit themselves over again. A lucky few will fall off the path and eventually return to the path, but for the most part the majority won't. With a daily resolution, if you fall off the path, you only need to wait to the next morning for a new opportunity. It's less wait for that clean slate. Granted if your new year resolution was to drop like 25 pounds, you won't be able to drop 25 pounds in one day. But what if your resolution for the day was to jog 45 minutes just for that day. Then your next day's resolution was to eat chicken, fish, veggies, fruits only, and do a body sculpting class that lasted an hour. Let's say the next day, you overslept so you missed the scheduled body sculpting class, then you gave in and ate the fresh batch of cookies that your client dropped off at your office. Guess what? You have the following day for another opportunity to actually follow-through on the previous day's resolution. The bottom line is that with a daily resolution, you don't have to wait until December 31-January 1 to start over.
Just remember that for each new day is a new opportunity for a daily resolution. Don't forget to be thankful for that new day. The reality is the fact that there is no guarantee for tomorrow. So be thankful for today, and go all out with your (daily) resolution(s). So what if you fall short. Just do your best.
So once again remember not to ask me what my new year's resolution is...OK, OK, my arm's twisted...oww...OK, here's my resolution:
My New Years' Resolution is to make TODAY a great day!!!
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I've decided to post this on a annual basis for New Years. Earlier this evening while watching a streaming NYE event, Rev Michael Beckwith pointed out that we do not need to wait for the numerical change on a calendar in order to create a transformation. We just need to choose, period.
You see, I grew up in a Chinese-American household. We had TWO New Years, give or take a month. In other words within a month if I had dropped off on a stated resolution in two weeks or less, there was a "second chance." Even so, since people from the Chinese community didn't really advocate the concept of a "New Year's Resolution," I hardly took advantage of my "2nd Chance."
So Happy Year of the Dragon. Here's my posting with some nominal editing word for word. Heck if the infamous Ann Landers could reprint her New Years column for forty-something years, why can't I repost, right?
You're never going to get me to answer that question.
"What's your New Year's Resolution?"
That question is probably perhaps the most counter-productive question for the majority of humanity seeking change and growth. Every month of January, I fight for parking spaces en route to the gym, and once I'm there, I'm salvaging what space is available for the workout class. Come the middle of February the attendance returns back to the normal regular gym attenders. That's just the physical resolution.
Please don't call me a cynic. I'm not. I'm sincerely into the growth for myself and other people. In fact, I'll be the first in line to support anyone and everyone who desires to make a change for the better in their life. So why am I so against the notion of making a new year's resolution? For starters, they don't work for the majority of people who pledge a resolution. I only use the gym as an example because I've observed this at the same gym for the past 5 years.
I am not ashamed of the fact that one of my past mentors was a 12-steps practitioner. Actually there were a couple of my mentors who regularly attended 12 steps meetings for one reason or another. One of the most valuable lessons I learned from their example was the value of TODAY. They didn't make bold, long-term resolutions, they simply made daily goals, one step at a time, one day at a time. From them I learned how to understand that expression:
So how do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time!
They lived it, they practiced it. It was from them that I learned to make "daily resolutions."
For the past few years of my pursuit of personal development, there was never more of a time where I had an appreciation learning from my 12-stepping mentors than during the time I "played" a "game" called PLD (Pacesetters Leadership Dynamics) What this was in a nutshell, 90 days of personal coaching, relationship building, accountability, and goal setting within a "team" setting. Throughout the 90 days, we reported in doing numerous challenging team and individual exercises to learn not only leadership, marketing, and relationship skills, but also to take a deeper look within. There were moments during those 90 days where I wanted to quit and walk away. However because of what I learned from my past mentors in taking things "a day at a time," I was able to complete one of the most challenging three-months period of my life. In that time frame, I went from 187 pounds to 173 pounds. (I'm currently at 175-77; PLD was almost 2 years ago) I invited and brought 12 people to church with me. Prior to that, I was a "lone ranger" church attender. I went on 22 dates with 8 different young ladies after putting myself on a 4 year dating drought. (2005-06 no dates; 2007 3 dates; 2008 2 dates) I contributed directly to 3 local charities in fund-raising and direct volunteer work, contacted my sister whom I had not spoken to in three years, became the first male student of the S Factor pole dancing course, and introduced over 17 people to the concept of personal development, 10 of them eventually signing up for taking a Basic course.
Now if I had looked at all that I did during those 90 days and was told that over the course of three months, I was going to do all of that, I would've went after it for maybe a week or two, then eventually gave up. However, I didn't because I took it a day at a time, and eventually 90 days came and passed.
The main disadvantage of the New Year's Resolution is that once most people fall off their respected path, they tend to stay off until the end of the year to re-commit themselves over again. A lucky few will fall off the path and eventually return to the path, but for the most part the majority won't. With a daily resolution, if you fall off the path, you only need to wait to the next morning for a new opportunity. It's less wait for that clean slate. Granted if your new year resolution was to drop like 25 pounds, you won't be able to drop 25 pounds in one day. But what if your resolution for the day was to jog 45 minutes just for that day. Then your next day's resolution was to eat chicken, fish, veggies, fruits only, and do a body sculpting class that lasted an hour. Let's say the next day, you overslept so you missed the scheduled body sculpting class, then you gave in and ate the fresh batch of cookies that your client dropped off at your office. Guess what? You have the following day for another opportunity to actually follow-through on the previous day's resolution. The bottom line is that with a daily resolution, you don't have to wait until December 31-January 1 to start over.
Just remember that for each new day is a new opportunity for a daily resolution. Don't forget to be thankful for that new day. The reality is the fact that there is no guarantee for tomorrow. So be thankful for today, and go all out with your (daily) resolution(s). So what if you fall short. Just do your best.
So once again remember not to ask me what my new year's resolution is...OK, OK, my arm's twisted...oww...OK, here's my resolution:
My New Years' Resolution is to make TODAY a great day!!!
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Saturday, December 24, 2011
Christmas Miracle 2006
This is basically an elaboration on the last blog 5 Year Christmas Journey.
When I visited Singapore for the first time during 2005 Thanksgiving week, I totally fell in love with that spot. Their performing arts scene was growing, their food is just indescribably good, the weather was hot year round, the cost of living slightly lower than the San Francisco Bay Area, and the women were just hot and attractive all around! I resolved to make a life out there.
Back-story here:
When Brenda and I split up after a 3-year "live-in" relationship in 2004, I moved back home to where I grew up in Oakland only to learn about my mom's newly discovered battle with cancer which she eventually succumbs to in June 2005. My life takes a gradual spiral from July 2004 to a complete out of control crash down throughout 2005. My anger at God was at an all time high. My core church support group moved to Austin the same month that my mother passed in 05, and I literally drifted from one church to another throughout the Bay Area. I was accepted to a Master's program with Fuller Seminary but after a futile attempt in taking Old Testament and Hebrew two months after my mom's death, I dropped out. Eventually, I sent out a mass email renouncing my Christian faith in April 2006 and shortly after was led to an auto accident later in May. Luckily my saving grace was a second trip to Singapore in May where I met an agent with Fly Entertainment in Singapore. She said I needed new headshots and wondered aloud why my headshots were "still in black and white." I acquired new color headshots in October/November 2006 shortly after creating a network at the 1st National Asian American Theater Conference. What saved my already fragile faith was 1) an appointment with Dr Wyatt where he recommended that I read Velvet Elvis by Rob Bell, and 2)a visit to the Mosaic Church in LA.
Still, I was determined to move to Singapore especially after dropping out of Fuller.
Did I mention that when I went "church-hopping" during my May 2006 Singapore trip, I met this enchanting young lady? Ironically before I departed on that trip, I complained to a friend of mine that I've given up on the idea of meeting someone of the opposite sex who'll make me go "wow." When I met her at a church service one Sunday afternoon, I was continuously in a "wow" frame of mind throughout our encounter. Count her in as another "factor" in my resolve to move to Singapore.
So Thanksgiving 2006, with new colored headshots in hand, I trekked for the 3rd time in a 1-year period to Singapore. Took in new sights, caught a couple of live stage performances, re-connected with friends that I made during the previous two trips, and eventually returned to Fly Entertainment. Naomi from Fly agreed to represent me and assist me on finding acting work, and public-related work. While shopping around Orchard Rd, I took the infamous "Christmas Photo" where I'm flipping the double birdie.
When I returned to the Bay Area at the end of the first week of December, I thought I was going to say goodbye to everyone. I mass-emailed my "Two Turtle Doves" Christmas photo declaring "I'm Outta Here!"
Upon helping my friends taking care of their then newborn in San Jose, I came upon a medical emergency. The plan was that I would stay for three days and help my friends get ready for their trip to Hong Kong by caring for their newborn in their home in San Jose. What happened in day 1 was that I was dropped off in the emergency room of Santa Clara Valley Medical Center with a 103 temperature and a very swollen baseball glove-sized infection of my left hand.
The emergency physician on duty took a look at my hand and immediately checked me into a hospital room. My hospital roommate was this Jeckyl n Hyde character who had these extreme mood swings, and at that point, I was in violent pain with my left hand. I was not able to place any sort of pressure on my left hand whatsoever and even the slightest touch caused an immense jolt of acute pain. I was receiving IV antibiotics, hoping to awake the next morning with a normal hand.
The next morning, more pain and more IV drugs on me including morphine. The doctor examined my hand and upon the minimal amount of contact, shot the most intense pain. Apparently the anti-biotics did nothing to clear the infection, and I was immediately scheduled for emergency surgery that day. I awoke post-surgery with a cast and plastic tubes inside my opened wounded hand. It was the first surgery I've experienced in my life. Upon returning to my room, I found immense discomfort, pain on my left hand, and antagonizing taunting from my roommate. My reference God was nothing but a series of heartfelt consecutive series of four-letter words. It should come to no surprise that the more intense the declaration of four-letter words to God, the more taunting from my roomie.
Upon examination the following morning, the physician on duty merely shook her head in discouragement. A few hours passed and I was visited by another physician who explained that the next scheduled surgery the following week was amputation. An hour afterwards, the hospital social workers entered with a preliminary application for disability and a notice of transfer to a San Mateo medical facility to take place prior to the scheduled amputation. As a resident of San Mateo County, and without medical insurance, I was not considered a "priority patient" to the center and was treated in a demeaning manner from the hospital staff from that point on. At that point, I debated whether or not to leave the hospital without authorization and to end it all. I did not see a point to fight and continue to live since I lost so much during the past two years. The idea to lose an actual body part would be the straw to break the camel's back. When I was visited by the hospital chaplain, he was encouraged by the fact that I kept my Bible at my bedside. I asked for which verses to read and study, he gave me a Psalm to read, and upon his departure, I turned to that Psalm and spat on the heading, then closed the book.
I don't know what came over me while sleeping after that moment, but I awoke and grabbed my phone, text messaged with my right hand to those that I considered "prayer warriors" that my left hand is scheduled to be amputated that following week. Within a few hours, I received phone call after phone call of encouragement and prayer. What was surprising was to receive calls from the actual hospital phone considering I did NOT give the hospital number out, nor information of which hospital I was at. But the word spread that I was lying alone in a hospital with no family. That was Thursday morning, and I began to receive floral, plant and gift deliveries to the hospital room. I began to place my suspended cast on a wheeler and started to walk myself around the hospital.
When I received a voicemail from my Sifu about a scheduled liondance performance that coming Sunday, I returned the call explaining my absence. He was surprised about my medical predicament. The friends who I was supposed to help out that week came by to drop off a Christmas Ogre. It was some sort of green furry creature who "grunted" out a medley of Christmas Carols. In both sound and appearance, that "toy" resembled my taunting roommate, who quickly demonstrated his "likeness" to the toy while my visitors observed in amusement. When they left, every time my roommate attempted to taunt me from his side of the room, I played that toy and laughed at the resemblance of behavior. Believe it or not, he eventually tapered off in his taunting and the room gradually became more and more quiet.
Saturday rolls around, and I found myself to be in better spirits. I don't know if it was because I took initiative to reach out and received support or because I found the situation to lighten. Even with the issue of the scheduled amputation and the supposed transfer of hospital, I let that go. I remembered one call I received on my cell. I didn't recognize the phone number, but I answered it anyways. On the other end was this very determined voice. She identified herself as Lorreene. She explained that a mutual friend had called her a few days prior about my situation. She went on the explain that she survived three major health ailments and fully recovered from all of them through the power of prayer and told me with the most utmost confidence, "I believe that you will walk out of this hospital Monday with your hand completely intact. That's what I prayed for, and that's what I believe will happen." I believed her considering the fact that my belief in a Higher Divine Power was shot to the ground at that point. It wasn't more than a hour that passed when I received a call on the hospital phone. Irene was on the other end of the phone, and she was my training-mate at an actors' conservatory, landlord, and like a simultaneous mother and sister to me. She was en route to her reiki circle and wanted more details about my situation. She explained to me that the "ki" in "reiki" is identical to the concept of "ch'i" from ch'i gung (hay gung in Cantonese). She had been a reiki practitioner for about 3 years at that point, and was a firm believer in distance reiki treatment. She also explained that because it was a circle and there were more than one practitioners were participating, the power of the ki was multiplied. After I hung up with her, dinner arrived and as I was eating dinner, I thought about my Sifu who was a regular practicer of Hay Gung. Guess who knocked on my door as my dinner was being cleared? My Sifu arrives and asked how I was doing. I apologized for not being able to make it to the performance the following day and he simply said not to worry that they had enough people to help. He looks over my cast, places his hands around the cast and concentrates. He steps out and his wife enters the room to see how I was doing. Towards the end of our conversation, we hear this declaration without a knock, "JARRETT, WE'RE HERE!!!"
Melinda and Vanessa where these two young ladies whom I hadn't been in contact with for over a year and a half. They were from Oakland and were determined that they would have their pastor "bless and annoint" some healing oil for them to take to me. In other words, they trekked from Oakland to San Jose just to place drops of oil into the opening of my cast. They too made a strong conviction declaring healing. We then chit-chatted about what else we were up to since we last saw each other.
I awoke Sunday morning refreshed. The nurse entered in to open the cast and to clean out the wound. At that point she insisted that I clean out my hand myself instead of having one of the staff doing it. She glances over the hand before placing in back in the cast and says, "hmmmm." At one point that day my roomie started his taunt and I immediately played my toy and chuckled. His taunt was short-lived. When dinner arrived, I requested to the staff that I were to cut my own meat though my hand was still in a cast. When the evening nurse arrived to cleanse my hand, my lion dance partner Jan arrived and gasped in disgust. "Hiiiii," I declared. I laughed to myself knowing that my open wound grossed her out. I asked her how the performance went and who she partnered with. She then presented me with a box of pastries from Golden Gate Bakery, including my favorite duntats. For someone who was in a cast awaiting amputation, I was in Heaven. At the same time, those words from Lorreene kept echoing in the back of my mind.
Monday morning arrives and I'm awoke from the shift physician. He opens my cast, takes a quick glance and declares, "oh no, I need to find your physician to take a look." I was immediately in a panic after hearing that. I persisted on why the sudden urgency. His reply: "it seems that your body finally accepted the anti-biotic treatment. I need to have her take a look at this and maybe she'll release you home." He excuses himself, and I drop to my knees in the most highest state of relief and gratitude. Then an hour passed. Then another hour passed. Then lunch came. The shift doctor re-enters the room explaining that he's about to end his shift and the physician in charge of my case has been backed up and should be there "any minute now." He shakes my hand and wishes me luck. Each passing minute felt like an hour. Finally my doctor arrives, opens my cast, examines it quickly, turns to me, "you wanna go home? I'll sign the release papers." Within an hour life begins to re-fill me. Then I came to an overwhelming thought...
"how the hell am I gonna get back home? how can I get my car???"
When I was dropped off at the hospital, I left my car and my overnight stuff with my friends. I was there to help them out because the husband was out of town on a business trip and his wife needed me to help her take care of their newborn. They were scheduled to fly out to Hong Kong for a Christmas family reunion that Saturday which was why they came by that Thursday to drop off my overnight stuff and keys. However my car was still over at their home. Then my phone rang. It was Jan. "Hey Jarrett, I wasn't sure if you were still gonna be in the hospital or not, but I was visiting someone in the SouthBay. Did you want me to stop by, and did you ever find out when you'll be getting out?" I told her I was getting out "NOW." So within an hour, I was "wheelchaired" out of the lobby of the hospital. (Policy) Now it may not have been a big deal, however my partner Jan resides in the Central Valley, and rarely would she be in the Southbay area, let alone of two consecutive days.
Then during discharge I was given an appointment for physical therapy in San Mateo County. Also, I had to sign a release form stating that in the event the infection returns and because the amputation was cancelled, if I were to "lose" my entire arm or anything beyond my hand, the center was not held liable. Then they further explained that I would regain only 70% of full motion and function of my left hand within 6-8 months following the release, and I should be grateful for even that as that would be considered my "full recovery." I went to my acupuncturist that following Tuesday, and I was already at 70% of full motion and function within 10 days.
This photo was taken during Chinese New Year in 2007 about 6 weeks after I was released from the hospital:
I was hanging out with some friends one night during the time between the surgery and CNY. We were studying how this one film was utilizing green screen technology. That film we were watching was The Secret. If you were to tell me that I would meet in-person about five of those speakers who were in the film within a two-year period, I'd have a more easier time to believe about the hand predicament and healing since I gone through that. The truth is, I would've concluded that what was expressed in that film was a bunch of hot air and stuff to avoid stepping on had I not gone through that hospital stay just a month prior.
Was it the prayer? Was it the Hay Gung or the reiki circle? Was it the oil? Was it the acupuncture treatment afterwards? Was it what the doctor concluded that "my body finally accepted the anti-biotics? I can honestly tell you that the conclusion of the so-called medical "expert" is the one I least believe. Remember, I was receiving anti-biotics via IV packs since arrival that Tuesday, and suddenly my "body finally accepted" the treatment almost a week and one surgery later. Or was it my change in attitude?
The gift of a transformed attitude. If I have to meditate, soak in oil, listen to prayer chants, sit in circles, I'll do what it'll take to transform an attitude. To me, that's the REAL miracle.
Merry Christmas!
When I visited Singapore for the first time during 2005 Thanksgiving week, I totally fell in love with that spot. Their performing arts scene was growing, their food is just indescribably good, the weather was hot year round, the cost of living slightly lower than the San Francisco Bay Area, and the women were just hot and attractive all around! I resolved to make a life out there.
Back-story here:
When Brenda and I split up after a 3-year "live-in" relationship in 2004, I moved back home to where I grew up in Oakland only to learn about my mom's newly discovered battle with cancer which she eventually succumbs to in June 2005. My life takes a gradual spiral from July 2004 to a complete out of control crash down throughout 2005. My anger at God was at an all time high. My core church support group moved to Austin the same month that my mother passed in 05, and I literally drifted from one church to another throughout the Bay Area. I was accepted to a Master's program with Fuller Seminary but after a futile attempt in taking Old Testament and Hebrew two months after my mom's death, I dropped out. Eventually, I sent out a mass email renouncing my Christian faith in April 2006 and shortly after was led to an auto accident later in May. Luckily my saving grace was a second trip to Singapore in May where I met an agent with Fly Entertainment in Singapore. She said I needed new headshots and wondered aloud why my headshots were "still in black and white." I acquired new color headshots in October/November 2006 shortly after creating a network at the 1st National Asian American Theater Conference. What saved my already fragile faith was 1) an appointment with Dr Wyatt where he recommended that I read Velvet Elvis by Rob Bell, and 2)a visit to the Mosaic Church in LA.
Still, I was determined to move to Singapore especially after dropping out of Fuller.
Did I mention that when I went "church-hopping" during my May 2006 Singapore trip, I met this enchanting young lady? Ironically before I departed on that trip, I complained to a friend of mine that I've given up on the idea of meeting someone of the opposite sex who'll make me go "wow." When I met her at a church service one Sunday afternoon, I was continuously in a "wow" frame of mind throughout our encounter. Count her in as another "factor" in my resolve to move to Singapore.
So Thanksgiving 2006, with new colored headshots in hand, I trekked for the 3rd time in a 1-year period to Singapore. Took in new sights, caught a couple of live stage performances, re-connected with friends that I made during the previous two trips, and eventually returned to Fly Entertainment. Naomi from Fly agreed to represent me and assist me on finding acting work, and public-related work. While shopping around Orchard Rd, I took the infamous "Christmas Photo" where I'm flipping the double birdie.
When I returned to the Bay Area at the end of the first week of December, I thought I was going to say goodbye to everyone. I mass-emailed my "Two Turtle Doves" Christmas photo declaring "I'm Outta Here!"
Upon helping my friends taking care of their then newborn in San Jose, I came upon a medical emergency. The plan was that I would stay for three days and help my friends get ready for their trip to Hong Kong by caring for their newborn in their home in San Jose. What happened in day 1 was that I was dropped off in the emergency room of Santa Clara Valley Medical Center with a 103 temperature and a very swollen baseball glove-sized infection of my left hand.
The emergency physician on duty took a look at my hand and immediately checked me into a hospital room. My hospital roommate was this Jeckyl n Hyde character who had these extreme mood swings, and at that point, I was in violent pain with my left hand. I was not able to place any sort of pressure on my left hand whatsoever and even the slightest touch caused an immense jolt of acute pain. I was receiving IV antibiotics, hoping to awake the next morning with a normal hand.
The next morning, more pain and more IV drugs on me including morphine. The doctor examined my hand and upon the minimal amount of contact, shot the most intense pain. Apparently the anti-biotics did nothing to clear the infection, and I was immediately scheduled for emergency surgery that day. I awoke post-surgery with a cast and plastic tubes inside my opened wounded hand. It was the first surgery I've experienced in my life. Upon returning to my room, I found immense discomfort, pain on my left hand, and antagonizing taunting from my roommate. My reference God was nothing but a series of heartfelt consecutive series of four-letter words. It should come to no surprise that the more intense the declaration of four-letter words to God, the more taunting from my roomie.
Upon examination the following morning, the physician on duty merely shook her head in discouragement. A few hours passed and I was visited by another physician who explained that the next scheduled surgery the following week was amputation. An hour afterwards, the hospital social workers entered with a preliminary application for disability and a notice of transfer to a San Mateo medical facility to take place prior to the scheduled amputation. As a resident of San Mateo County, and without medical insurance, I was not considered a "priority patient" to the center and was treated in a demeaning manner from the hospital staff from that point on. At that point, I debated whether or not to leave the hospital without authorization and to end it all. I did not see a point to fight and continue to live since I lost so much during the past two years. The idea to lose an actual body part would be the straw to break the camel's back. When I was visited by the hospital chaplain, he was encouraged by the fact that I kept my Bible at my bedside. I asked for which verses to read and study, he gave me a Psalm to read, and upon his departure, I turned to that Psalm and spat on the heading, then closed the book.
I don't know what came over me while sleeping after that moment, but I awoke and grabbed my phone, text messaged with my right hand to those that I considered "prayer warriors" that my left hand is scheduled to be amputated that following week. Within a few hours, I received phone call after phone call of encouragement and prayer. What was surprising was to receive calls from the actual hospital phone considering I did NOT give the hospital number out, nor information of which hospital I was at. But the word spread that I was lying alone in a hospital with no family. That was Thursday morning, and I began to receive floral, plant and gift deliveries to the hospital room. I began to place my suspended cast on a wheeler and started to walk myself around the hospital.
When I received a voicemail from my Sifu about a scheduled liondance performance that coming Sunday, I returned the call explaining my absence. He was surprised about my medical predicament. The friends who I was supposed to help out that week came by to drop off a Christmas Ogre. It was some sort of green furry creature who "grunted" out a medley of Christmas Carols. In both sound and appearance, that "toy" resembled my taunting roommate, who quickly demonstrated his "likeness" to the toy while my visitors observed in amusement. When they left, every time my roommate attempted to taunt me from his side of the room, I played that toy and laughed at the resemblance of behavior. Believe it or not, he eventually tapered off in his taunting and the room gradually became more and more quiet.
Saturday rolls around, and I found myself to be in better spirits. I don't know if it was because I took initiative to reach out and received support or because I found the situation to lighten. Even with the issue of the scheduled amputation and the supposed transfer of hospital, I let that go. I remembered one call I received on my cell. I didn't recognize the phone number, but I answered it anyways. On the other end was this very determined voice. She identified herself as Lorreene. She explained that a mutual friend had called her a few days prior about my situation. She went on the explain that she survived three major health ailments and fully recovered from all of them through the power of prayer and told me with the most utmost confidence, "I believe that you will walk out of this hospital Monday with your hand completely intact. That's what I prayed for, and that's what I believe will happen." I believed her considering the fact that my belief in a Higher Divine Power was shot to the ground at that point. It wasn't more than a hour that passed when I received a call on the hospital phone. Irene was on the other end of the phone, and she was my training-mate at an actors' conservatory, landlord, and like a simultaneous mother and sister to me. She was en route to her reiki circle and wanted more details about my situation. She explained to me that the "ki" in "reiki" is identical to the concept of "ch'i" from ch'i gung (hay gung in Cantonese). She had been a reiki practitioner for about 3 years at that point, and was a firm believer in distance reiki treatment. She also explained that because it was a circle and there were more than one practitioners were participating, the power of the ki was multiplied. After I hung up with her, dinner arrived and as I was eating dinner, I thought about my Sifu who was a regular practicer of Hay Gung. Guess who knocked on my door as my dinner was being cleared? My Sifu arrives and asked how I was doing. I apologized for not being able to make it to the performance the following day and he simply said not to worry that they had enough people to help. He looks over my cast, places his hands around the cast and concentrates. He steps out and his wife enters the room to see how I was doing. Towards the end of our conversation, we hear this declaration without a knock, "JARRETT, WE'RE HERE!!!"
Melinda and Vanessa where these two young ladies whom I hadn't been in contact with for over a year and a half. They were from Oakland and were determined that they would have their pastor "bless and annoint" some healing oil for them to take to me. In other words, they trekked from Oakland to San Jose just to place drops of oil into the opening of my cast. They too made a strong conviction declaring healing. We then chit-chatted about what else we were up to since we last saw each other.
I awoke Sunday morning refreshed. The nurse entered in to open the cast and to clean out the wound. At that point she insisted that I clean out my hand myself instead of having one of the staff doing it. She glances over the hand before placing in back in the cast and says, "hmmmm." At one point that day my roomie started his taunt and I immediately played my toy and chuckled. His taunt was short-lived. When dinner arrived, I requested to the staff that I were to cut my own meat though my hand was still in a cast. When the evening nurse arrived to cleanse my hand, my lion dance partner Jan arrived and gasped in disgust. "Hiiiii," I declared. I laughed to myself knowing that my open wound grossed her out. I asked her how the performance went and who she partnered with. She then presented me with a box of pastries from Golden Gate Bakery, including my favorite duntats. For someone who was in a cast awaiting amputation, I was in Heaven. At the same time, those words from Lorreene kept echoing in the back of my mind.
Monday morning arrives and I'm awoke from the shift physician. He opens my cast, takes a quick glance and declares, "oh no, I need to find your physician to take a look." I was immediately in a panic after hearing that. I persisted on why the sudden urgency. His reply: "it seems that your body finally accepted the anti-biotic treatment. I need to have her take a look at this and maybe she'll release you home." He excuses himself, and I drop to my knees in the most highest state of relief and gratitude. Then an hour passed. Then another hour passed. Then lunch came. The shift doctor re-enters the room explaining that he's about to end his shift and the physician in charge of my case has been backed up and should be there "any minute now." He shakes my hand and wishes me luck. Each passing minute felt like an hour. Finally my doctor arrives, opens my cast, examines it quickly, turns to me, "you wanna go home? I'll sign the release papers." Within an hour life begins to re-fill me. Then I came to an overwhelming thought...
"how the hell am I gonna get back home? how can I get my car???"
When I was dropped off at the hospital, I left my car and my overnight stuff with my friends. I was there to help them out because the husband was out of town on a business trip and his wife needed me to help her take care of their newborn. They were scheduled to fly out to Hong Kong for a Christmas family reunion that Saturday which was why they came by that Thursday to drop off my overnight stuff and keys. However my car was still over at their home. Then my phone rang. It was Jan. "Hey Jarrett, I wasn't sure if you were still gonna be in the hospital or not, but I was visiting someone in the SouthBay. Did you want me to stop by, and did you ever find out when you'll be getting out?" I told her I was getting out "NOW." So within an hour, I was "wheelchaired" out of the lobby of the hospital. (Policy) Now it may not have been a big deal, however my partner Jan resides in the Central Valley, and rarely would she be in the Southbay area, let alone of two consecutive days.
Then during discharge I was given an appointment for physical therapy in San Mateo County. Also, I had to sign a release form stating that in the event the infection returns and because the amputation was cancelled, if I were to "lose" my entire arm or anything beyond my hand, the center was not held liable. Then they further explained that I would regain only 70% of full motion and function of my left hand within 6-8 months following the release, and I should be grateful for even that as that would be considered my "full recovery." I went to my acupuncturist that following Tuesday, and I was already at 70% of full motion and function within 10 days.
This photo was taken during Chinese New Year in 2007 about 6 weeks after I was released from the hospital:
I was hanging out with some friends one night during the time between the surgery and CNY. We were studying how this one film was utilizing green screen technology. That film we were watching was The Secret. If you were to tell me that I would meet in-person about five of those speakers who were in the film within a two-year period, I'd have a more easier time to believe about the hand predicament and healing since I gone through that. The truth is, I would've concluded that what was expressed in that film was a bunch of hot air and stuff to avoid stepping on had I not gone through that hospital stay just a month prior.
Was it the prayer? Was it the Hay Gung or the reiki circle? Was it the oil? Was it the acupuncture treatment afterwards? Was it what the doctor concluded that "my body finally accepted the anti-biotics? I can honestly tell you that the conclusion of the so-called medical "expert" is the one I least believe. Remember, I was receiving anti-biotics via IV packs since arrival that Tuesday, and suddenly my "body finally accepted" the treatment almost a week and one surgery later. Or was it my change in attitude?
The gift of a transformed attitude. If I have to meditate, soak in oil, listen to prayer chants, sit in circles, I'll do what it'll take to transform an attitude. To me, that's the REAL miracle.
Merry Christmas!
Saturday, December 17, 2011
The 5 Year Christmas Journey
In Thanksgiving week 2006, I trekked to Singapore for the 3rd time in a one-year span, determined to create a new life there. Prior to the trip, I made new actor headshots, updated my resume, and obtained copies of So Beauty to take along with me. Upon arrival, I met up with an agent from Fly Entertainment and she agreed to represent me in Singapore. I felt like I scored an opportunity to move out there. I returned to the Bay Area around the 10th of December that year. While in Sunny Singapore, I shopped around and took a Christmas photo that I sent out to everyone: "Merry F*cking Christmas Everyone, I'm Outta Here!!!
I thought I was out of "here." (As in the Bay Area)
Upon returning to the Bay Area, I drove down to San Jose to assist in taking care of my niece for a few days while her father was traveling in Japan for work. Within the first hour or so, my friend noticed a swollen left hand and a high fever and eventually dropped me off at the Santa Clara Valley Medical Center. Upon examination, I was immediately checked into the facility and scheduled for an emergency surgery. Two days following the surgery, the doctors notices that my hand infection GREW and was spreading all over, and I was eventually scheduled to have my left hand amputated. I was pretty close to losing my left hand in Christmas 2006 which would've been a challenge considering I lost my mother in Christmas 2005.
This segment about what I refer to as the "2006 Christmas Hand Miracle" will be posted in more specific details in a future blog. I type this entry during Christmas 2011 with BOTH HANDS.
I auditioned for a theatrical certification programme in Singapore and was accepted in 2007. I then applied for a long-term student status resident visa and was promptly denied. While at the audition (July 2007) I learned that the agent who took me to represent me had herself an emergency surgical procedure and I was eventually dropped from the Singapore agency. My acceptance to the theater programme was my only hope to get into Singapore. I re-applied for a student visa THREE TIMES to the Singaporean government from Sept 07-Jan 08.
When I was introduced to PSI Seminars in the fall of 2007, I was reluctant to take any sort of courses from them. My friend who was en route to the Life Success Course then, challenged me such that if I was unable to secure a long term residence visa in Singapore by the 15 Jan 2008, I myself would take the course. So when I registered for the PSI Basic Seminar via phone on 16-Jan 2008 SINGAPORE TIME, there was a little apprehension on my behalf. Taking that course initially from my point of view, was an indication of "failure" that I was NOT "out of here."
At mid-point of the Basic Seminar, our class was given an exercise as a group. Upon completion of that particular exercise it was explained to me that the way I participated in that exercise, was the way I participated in my life overall. I was initially in denial of that assessment because I vividly recall that during the exercise, I was upset at another participant that I reacted by flipping the entire group off with the infamous "middle." I was also given a self-reflective homework assignment regarding the exercise, so upon returning home, I turned my computer on and what was staring at me was my "2006 Christmas Greeting."
Yup, that same photo.
So from March 2008 to now, I constantly looked at the way I interacted with people, making sure that my hand was in a position of giving instead of "that gesture." Nothing's perfect, however I'd have to say that after 5 years, I'm actually "showing up" more so during this Holiday Season.
2006 Holiday was the "Flip and Snip" hand theme.
2007 Holiday was alone and I "celebrated" over the death of a zoo visitor that year.
2008 Was a holiday where I learned to ski...and fell.
2009 Escape to Southeast Asia
2010 On Facebook, I acknowledged the Holiday Season with a solid black image on my profile.
This Holiday 2011:
For the first time since 2004, I cooked one of the main entrees (Thanksgiving)
For the first time since 2003, I helped decorate a Christmas tree
For the first time since 1999, I helped kettle bell-ringing on behalf of The Salvation Army.
On Facebook, I posted the "G-rated" version of my 2006 Christmas photo recently. I promise to, for the first time since 2006, take a Holiday photo of myself.
I thought I was out of "here." (As in the Bay Area)
Upon returning to the Bay Area, I drove down to San Jose to assist in taking care of my niece for a few days while her father was traveling in Japan for work. Within the first hour or so, my friend noticed a swollen left hand and a high fever and eventually dropped me off at the Santa Clara Valley Medical Center. Upon examination, I was immediately checked into the facility and scheduled for an emergency surgery. Two days following the surgery, the doctors notices that my hand infection GREW and was spreading all over, and I was eventually scheduled to have my left hand amputated. I was pretty close to losing my left hand in Christmas 2006 which would've been a challenge considering I lost my mother in Christmas 2005.
This segment about what I refer to as the "2006 Christmas Hand Miracle" will be posted in more specific details in a future blog. I type this entry during Christmas 2011 with BOTH HANDS.
I auditioned for a theatrical certification programme in Singapore and was accepted in 2007. I then applied for a long-term student status resident visa and was promptly denied. While at the audition (July 2007) I learned that the agent who took me to represent me had herself an emergency surgical procedure and I was eventually dropped from the Singapore agency. My acceptance to the theater programme was my only hope to get into Singapore. I re-applied for a student visa THREE TIMES to the Singaporean government from Sept 07-Jan 08.
When I was introduced to PSI Seminars in the fall of 2007, I was reluctant to take any sort of courses from them. My friend who was en route to the Life Success Course then, challenged me such that if I was unable to secure a long term residence visa in Singapore by the 15 Jan 2008, I myself would take the course. So when I registered for the PSI Basic Seminar via phone on 16-Jan 2008 SINGAPORE TIME, there was a little apprehension on my behalf. Taking that course initially from my point of view, was an indication of "failure" that I was NOT "out of here."
At mid-point of the Basic Seminar, our class was given an exercise as a group. Upon completion of that particular exercise it was explained to me that the way I participated in that exercise, was the way I participated in my life overall. I was initially in denial of that assessment because I vividly recall that during the exercise, I was upset at another participant that I reacted by flipping the entire group off with the infamous "middle." I was also given a self-reflective homework assignment regarding the exercise, so upon returning home, I turned my computer on and what was staring at me was my "2006 Christmas Greeting."
Yup, that same photo.
So from March 2008 to now, I constantly looked at the way I interacted with people, making sure that my hand was in a position of giving instead of "that gesture." Nothing's perfect, however I'd have to say that after 5 years, I'm actually "showing up" more so during this Holiday Season.
2006 Holiday was the "Flip and Snip" hand theme.
2007 Holiday was alone and I "celebrated" over the death of a zoo visitor that year.
2008 Was a holiday where I learned to ski...and fell.
2009 Escape to Southeast Asia
2010 On Facebook, I acknowledged the Holiday Season with a solid black image on my profile.
This Holiday 2011:
For the first time since 2004, I cooked one of the main entrees (Thanksgiving)
For the first time since 2003, I helped decorate a Christmas tree
For the first time since 1999, I helped kettle bell-ringing on behalf of The Salvation Army.
On Facebook, I posted the "G-rated" version of my 2006 Christmas photo recently. I promise to, for the first time since 2006, take a Holiday photo of myself.
Saturday, November 26, 2011
The Great I AM
The greatest gift to yourself is to accept, receive, and share the inner gift within to others.
Upon that realization, I came to the conclusion that as passionate I am about acting and performing, I really shortchanged myself by declaring that "I am an actor/performer/writer."
I'm much more than that.
I don't like the term "divine" so much because I found that word to be overly cliched and quite simply, overused within discussions of spirituality. I find it as overused and overcharged as the "G" word.
However, as a Divine Being, that's exactly who I AM. I'm unable to find others words to replace. It means to much to be a DB. But that's who I am in the purest sense. It's also who everyone else is in the purest sense.
Call it what you feel most comfortable calling Divine: "God-self, Higher-Self, enlightened self, spirit-self, blissful self, higher-power." That essence is not only our common-denominator, but it's what unifies all of us. Personally for myself, I prefer to use the term, "Imago Dei." (Latin for "Image of God") I learned the concept of Imago Dei within my Christian training, but I use it towards everyone regardless of their beliefs.
Going back to what I was originally going to say, by declaring myself as "JUST" an actor, or a writer, or a performer, or a public speaker really keeps me into this limited shield that prevents me from other opportunities. I understand that with most conversations, the initial question is "what do you do for a living?" That's when I trap myself by attempting to articulate an answer that'll make a favorable impression upon the person(s) asking me.
But answering in such a way does neither myself or the person asking any favors. I'm not answering from my "core." It's spinning an answer in such a way to make an impression. But doing so shortchanges everyone involved in the conversation, especially myself. The thing is, what exactly do I tell people when asked that question. I do work as an actor and I do get compensated for the work I do. Writing is more of a therapeutic tool for myself. I tend to be the public face for our performing martial arts group.
But it's still not who I AM. I AM that cliche: "spiritual being having a human experience." Just like yourself. Just like the idiot who waved the middle finger as s/he cut us off while driving. (Though admittedly I'm far from acknowledging their Divine at that moment!) We created a world that judges according to what someone does or doesn't do. We're not created to judge. We're simply created to just be.
Maybe this should be on my Faith Entry page instead.
Upon that realization, I came to the conclusion that as passionate I am about acting and performing, I really shortchanged myself by declaring that "I am an actor/performer/writer."
I'm much more than that.
I don't like the term "divine" so much because I found that word to be overly cliched and quite simply, overused within discussions of spirituality. I find it as overused and overcharged as the "G" word.
However, as a Divine Being, that's exactly who I AM. I'm unable to find others words to replace. It means to much to be a DB. But that's who I am in the purest sense. It's also who everyone else is in the purest sense.
Call it what you feel most comfortable calling Divine: "God-self, Higher-Self, enlightened self, spirit-self, blissful self, higher-power." That essence is not only our common-denominator, but it's what unifies all of us. Personally for myself, I prefer to use the term, "Imago Dei." (Latin for "Image of God") I learned the concept of Imago Dei within my Christian training, but I use it towards everyone regardless of their beliefs.
Going back to what I was originally going to say, by declaring myself as "JUST" an actor, or a writer, or a performer, or a public speaker really keeps me into this limited shield that prevents me from other opportunities. I understand that with most conversations, the initial question is "what do you do for a living?" That's when I trap myself by attempting to articulate an answer that'll make a favorable impression upon the person(s) asking me.
But answering in such a way does neither myself or the person asking any favors. I'm not answering from my "core." It's spinning an answer in such a way to make an impression. But doing so shortchanges everyone involved in the conversation, especially myself. The thing is, what exactly do I tell people when asked that question. I do work as an actor and I do get compensated for the work I do. Writing is more of a therapeutic tool for myself. I tend to be the public face for our performing martial arts group.
But it's still not who I AM. I AM that cliche: "spiritual being having a human experience." Just like yourself. Just like the idiot who waved the middle finger as s/he cut us off while driving. (Though admittedly I'm far from acknowledging their Divine at that moment!) We created a world that judges according to what someone does or doesn't do. We're not created to judge. We're simply created to just be.
Maybe this should be on my Faith Entry page instead.
Saturday, October 29, 2011
Unoccupied Mind
I don't get it.
I really don't. I understand our 1st Amendment right to publicly assemble, to voice our opinion. In fact, I'm adamant about that right as an American, and oftentimes I don't feel like I fit in as an American. With this journey of pursuit of growth, I truly believe in the empowerment of everyone being heard and respected.
Which is why I don't get the Occupy Oakland movement.
First off, I'm impressed that so many people are able to "CAMP" out in Downtown Oakland for this amount of time WITHOUT ONE HOMICIDE OR VIOLENT ROBBERY. I've heard that a sexual assault occurred at one point, which is damaging to all those involved, but I really have to give kudos that for the most part, it's been relatively safe for those who CHOOSE to camp in Oakland. Bear in mind that the campers were living outdoors within the city limits of the Bay Area city with the highest homicide rate. In fact 8 homicides have been reported within the City limits since the camps begun. Why wasn't the "hood" occupied?
Secondly, as a native of Oakland, I'm very flattered that Oakland is considered to be part of the 1%. I've grown up with so much negative reaction over the years upon people learning about my origins. This and that about violent crime, political corruption, unsafe area, not deserving any type of professional sports franchise because of having a poor economy, ect. Now Oakland is currently a 1% target. Funny, I could've swore Oakland was so broke, they laid off quite a few police officers, firefighters, ect. So OK, Oakland is part of the 1%. Good to know, that way Oakland can "save" their exiting sports franchises: Raiders, A's, and Warriors. (Hell, if Oakland was part of the 1%, you'd think the Warriors would've called themselves "Oakland" by now instead of "Golden State")
I hear the frustration amongst the protesters about the economic situation. I've worked very sparingly especially these past two years. If anything I'm lucky to have worked a total of SIXTY days during the past SEVEN-HUNDRED-THIRTY. The thing is I know camping out and protesting does very little for me. In fact, I believe occupying anything would work against me. All this talk about 1% hoarding the wealth but you're taking down small business along with you by blocking and driving people away from the area. In fact, based on articles and interviews there's an unapologetic stance against the local business owners. All this talk about representing the 99% which these small business owners belong to, and you're deliberately taking them down? That sort of behavior is no better than the supposed behavior you're protesting against.
So the question again, why are you occupying Oakland?
Of all places. I can understand Wall Street where all the major commerce eventually intersect. Even the Financial District in San Francisco. Why not Washington DC? or Sacramento? Or even the IRS? But Oakland? Back up the folks already at the Federal Reserve in SF.
This game of entitlement is played out. Notice that I don't condone the police action. I learned early in life that if a pit bull dog chases me out of an area, even if I'M IN THE RIGHT, it's best not to "take back" the area where the pit bull is located. If I'm nursing a bite after my attempt to "take back" that area, I'M THE ONE WHO HAS TO ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY for that bite. No one else.
OH BTW, please do not take up any causes unique to Oakland as justification for Occupy Oakland. That's utter bullsh!t. Honestly the majority of you occupiers in Oakland don't give a rats a$$ about the problems with Oakland. Otherwise why wait until Wall Street and San Francisco went up first? Problems unique to Oakland, such as homicides, police brutality, political corruption did not just showed up right after camp started in NY and SF. How about Occupy EAST OAKLAND then? Set up camp in the Havenscourt area. There are a lot of people in Oakland who are actually honest and hard-working, who's struggling as much as you are. In fact, they're NOT the 1% you're protesting. Yet, they received another unwanted perceptive "black eye" because of the ruckus last week. Do you really care about them? If you don't, then from a moral standpoint, you have no right to protest the 1%, cause in reality you're no better than them.
I really don't. I understand our 1st Amendment right to publicly assemble, to voice our opinion. In fact, I'm adamant about that right as an American, and oftentimes I don't feel like I fit in as an American. With this journey of pursuit of growth, I truly believe in the empowerment of everyone being heard and respected.
Which is why I don't get the Occupy Oakland movement.
First off, I'm impressed that so many people are able to "CAMP" out in Downtown Oakland for this amount of time WITHOUT ONE HOMICIDE OR VIOLENT ROBBERY. I've heard that a sexual assault occurred at one point, which is damaging to all those involved, but I really have to give kudos that for the most part, it's been relatively safe for those who CHOOSE to camp in Oakland. Bear in mind that the campers were living outdoors within the city limits of the Bay Area city with the highest homicide rate. In fact 8 homicides have been reported within the City limits since the camps begun. Why wasn't the "hood" occupied?
Secondly, as a native of Oakland, I'm very flattered that Oakland is considered to be part of the 1%. I've grown up with so much negative reaction over the years upon people learning about my origins. This and that about violent crime, political corruption, unsafe area, not deserving any type of professional sports franchise because of having a poor economy, ect. Now Oakland is currently a 1% target. Funny, I could've swore Oakland was so broke, they laid off quite a few police officers, firefighters, ect. So OK, Oakland is part of the 1%. Good to know, that way Oakland can "save" their exiting sports franchises: Raiders, A's, and Warriors. (Hell, if Oakland was part of the 1%, you'd think the Warriors would've called themselves "Oakland" by now instead of "Golden State")
I hear the frustration amongst the protesters about the economic situation. I've worked very sparingly especially these past two years. If anything I'm lucky to have worked a total of SIXTY days during the past SEVEN-HUNDRED-THIRTY. The thing is I know camping out and protesting does very little for me. In fact, I believe occupying anything would work against me. All this talk about 1% hoarding the wealth but you're taking down small business along with you by blocking and driving people away from the area. In fact, based on articles and interviews there's an unapologetic stance against the local business owners. All this talk about representing the 99% which these small business owners belong to, and you're deliberately taking them down? That sort of behavior is no better than the supposed behavior you're protesting against.
So the question again, why are you occupying Oakland?
Of all places. I can understand Wall Street where all the major commerce eventually intersect. Even the Financial District in San Francisco. Why not Washington DC? or Sacramento? Or even the IRS? But Oakland? Back up the folks already at the Federal Reserve in SF.
This game of entitlement is played out. Notice that I don't condone the police action. I learned early in life that if a pit bull dog chases me out of an area, even if I'M IN THE RIGHT, it's best not to "take back" the area where the pit bull is located. If I'm nursing a bite after my attempt to "take back" that area, I'M THE ONE WHO HAS TO ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY for that bite. No one else.
OH BTW, please do not take up any causes unique to Oakland as justification for Occupy Oakland. That's utter bullsh!t. Honestly the majority of you occupiers in Oakland don't give a rats a$$ about the problems with Oakland. Otherwise why wait until Wall Street and San Francisco went up first? Problems unique to Oakland, such as homicides, police brutality, political corruption did not just showed up right after camp started in NY and SF. How about Occupy EAST OAKLAND then? Set up camp in the Havenscourt area. There are a lot of people in Oakland who are actually honest and hard-working, who's struggling as much as you are. In fact, they're NOT the 1% you're protesting. Yet, they received another unwanted perceptive "black eye" because of the ruckus last week. Do you really care about them? If you don't, then from a moral standpoint, you have no right to protest the 1%, cause in reality you're no better than them.
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